Let me be your plumber

 “Nature meant for you to be happy. Nature is on our side, so we are not alone.”

Nature spent millions of years making human beings loveable to each other, and you are a human being. One of the main functions of my processes is to help you see yourself as you really are, loveable.

You can take away the roadblocks that were blindly put up by others. These roadblocks have prevented you from loving yourself full measure. They have also prevented others from loving you full measure.

You can find out what detours you had to take off the Road of Happiness to outflank the roadblocks.

You can find out where you got lost and get back on The Road. Nature meant for you to be happy. Nature is on our side, so we are not alone.

My approach is about peer “therapy” i.e. peer education, vs. the classical treatment approach of authority-underling or doctor-patient.

Whatever I learned, you can learn. Whatever I unlearned, you can unlearn, Whatever I basically need or do not need, you basically need or do not need. Bottom Line: What basically-biologically gives me pleasure or pain, will give you pleasure or pain. We are equal and alike. The differences between us are infinitesimal compared to the similarities. We have millions and millions of years in common and only a lifetime of differences.

Do not put someone leading peer education in a separate class such as: He is superior because he is the knowledgeable doctor-teacher, and I am inferior because I am the unknowing patient-student. Your guide is your peer. Your guide may have knowledge that you want to learn or otherwise use. That makes the guide knowledgeable, not superior. You may have a desire to learn some things. That makes you a student, not an inferior. Think of your guide as you would a good, honest, efficient, and effective plumber.

No one puts a plumber on a pedestal. No one thinks a plumber is better than s/he is. You can respect plumbers for the knowledge of their trade. You can respect them for their honesty, promptness, and efficiency. But I never met anyone who looks up to plumbers because of their trade, or puts them on a pedestal.

Written by Daniel Casriel, MD

Daniel Harold Casriel, M.D., born in New York City on March 1, 1924, was an American psychiatrist, psychoanalyst and writer. He was a past president of the American Society of Psychoanalytic Physicians. He founded the Daytop treatment centers. Casriel died on June 7, 1983 at the age of 59 from a form of Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS). After graduation from the University of Cincinnati College of Medicine at age twenty-five, Casriel began his residency at the Kingsbridge Veterans' Administration Hospital. Less than a year into his residency, he was drafted and sent to Okinawa where he served as an Army psychiatrist. Beyond shaping the field of addictions treatment and psychotherapy, Casriel profoundly influenced the launch of relationship education. His intensive couples workshops for Lori Heyman Gordon's Family Relations Institute in Northern Virginia provided the framework for what emerged into the range of PAIRS' relationship education seminars and trainings that have touched millions of lives. Casriel popularized the theory that the "emotion of love" comes from the anticipation of pleasure. Based on Casriel's theory, "bonding," which he defined as "the unique combination of emotional openness and physical closeness with another human being," is central to sustaining healthy, intimate relationships. Casriel taught that symptoms of bonding deprivation include: "illness, fatigue, depression, rigidity, constriction, isolation, and the range of anti-social behaviors such as drug and alcohol abuse, gambling and sex addictions." Casriel considered bonding a biologically-based need similar to the need for food, water, air, and shelter, yet unique as the only biological need people cannot meet for themselves.

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